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Worry
Machines
by
Patrick Plaskett |
He
said, “My life has been filled with great misfortunes, ninety
percent of which never occurred.”
The writer of this statement was describing the most common ailment
affecting the minds of today – worry. Worry can produce anything
from mild discomfort to the total destruction of the quality of one’s
life. It is so common that it is taken as normal, although it is certainly
not natural.
Children have to be taught to worry. They are naturally content with
living from one moment to the next, dealing with events as they arise.
As they mature, they learn to build a mental model of reality, a cognitive
framework, so that they can make meaningful plans and successfully
predict events. Somewhere in this process of enculturation, many people
learn the habit of taking this mental model as more meaningful than
the reality of the present moment. They then experience life by thinking
about it more than any other way. They forget the direct experience
of life that they felt while swinging on a swing or playing with their
friends. When their thoughts of the future include the possibilities
of undesirable outcomes, they experience these thoughts as if the
outcomes were real. They learn to worry and experience anxiety.
Worse yet, many people are taught that they should worry, including
the mothers who believe that they should worry about their children,
and students who believe that they should worry about their test results.
The distinction between worry and rational concern doesn’t even
exist for these people. Most of us are affected by this confusion
to one degree or another.
I had a friend drop by my house in a frantic state of worry about
an upcoming appearance in court. I told her that if worrying had any
good use, I would sit down and worry with her, and together we would
resolve her situation in half the time. Of course this was ridiculous,
for the court date was two days away. Yet she continued to worry.
Why? She had developed her mind to be a freewheeling worry machine
to the point that she was no longer using it, but it was using her.
That’s common. Our cognitive frameworks become self-contained
realities with every rationalization to continue useless worry.
My friend explained that her fears were well-founded, and a bad outcome
was a real possibility. “Real possibility?” I asked. “You’re
confusing reality with possibility! In your present mental state,
you can’t tell the difference between the two.”
“Real possibility” is such an untidy term. When some people
use it, they actually mean a possibility to be aware of out of rational
concern. These people get a sense of empowerment from knowledge of
possible outcomes. Other people will react to possibility as if it
were reality, and enter a state of real anxiety. I prefer to think
of projected outcomes as either possible or probable. Then I can conduct
myself appropriately.
We have a physiological response of anxiety for our own protection.
If there were a snake coiled at your feet, ready to strike, it would
be natural for you to be anxious as you looked for an opportunity
to escape danger. Yet most people who experience anxiety are not reacting
to any present danger, but to ideas in their heads! So they go to
the doctor who prescribes medication so that they don’t feel
the effects of this reaction so intensely.
Shyness has been reclassified as “social anxiety disorder”
so that people can be drugged for it. Rather than being a pathological
condition requiring chemical intervention, it could be the result
of putting one’s attention on the fantasy of possible social
rejection. The cause of anxiety and depression is not a deficiency
of mood altering drugs in your diet. Most common types of anxiety
are reactions to fantastic predictions of the future. Sometimes they
are reactions to memories of the past, as if we could change past
events by thinking about them. In either case, the present attention
is misdirected to thoughts of the past or future as if we could directly
influence events by worrying about them in the present.
You can be realistic in the use of your mind according to what you
can do now. If the building is on fire, leave now. Don’t worry
about your papers. If you have a flat tire on the way to work, change
it now. Don’t worry about any repercussions arising from being
late; you won’t even know what they are until you arrive. If
your company is closing and you’ll be out of a job, take stock
of your finances and update your resume now; don’t react as
if homelessness were a certainty. Always measure your thoughts against
any realistic action you can take now.
Of course we all have misfortunes come our way. Any rational dealing
with problems is going to be done in the present, not the past or
the future. You’ll be able to deal with tomorrow’s problems
when tomorrow becomes the present, and not a moment sooner. If you
need to prepare for tomorrow, do so realistically today. You can recognize
possibilities for what they are, realizing the difference between
possibilities and probabilities.
Observe your freewheeling worry machine in motion. It will offer you
possibilities as if they were real. Notice your reaction to these
thoughts. You will get a feeling. Many people feel lousy as they find
it easier to imagine undesirable outcomes than the desirable ones.
It’s a much better use of the imagination to contemplate the
circumstances that you truly desire. This practice can give you a
good feeling, an empowering feeling. The positive anticipation of
what you want is not only healthier, it also tilts the game of life
in your favor. And always recognize the difference between reality
and possibility, so you can put your attention in the real world.
Patrick Plaskett is a member of the Florida Association of
Professional Hypnotists and holds a Bachelor’s Degree from
USF. He can be reached at the Center for Healing in St. Petersburg,
(727) 381-9101.
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