March/April 2002
Feature Articles
Holistic Health Q & A
by Karen R. Raymund
Of PMS, premenopausal weight-gain,
and osteoporosis.
What is... Psychotherapy?
by Charles Larsen
Of various schools of psychotherapy
and what to expect and look for.
EnergyUpDate
by David Findlay
Articles on the theme "Good & Bad Habits"
Teaching Good Habits
by Barbara Bedingfield
A Waldorf teacher's viewpoint on how
adults should teach children the importance of good habits.
Mother Of All Bad Habits
by Aman Motwane
The habit of chasing illusions rather
than seeing the world as it is and dealing wih reality.
It's All Habit
by Patrick Plaskett
Using the mechanism of habits to get
the results in life that we want.
Improving Your Game
by Rev. Pat Cross
The effect habits have on our lives.
Using good habits to accentuate the positive.
The Fewer the Better
by Lisa Raphael
Letting go of habits and, instead,
living fully conscious of our thoughts, feelings and actions.
Changing From The Inside
by Rev. Linda Lou Kearns
Having the courage to be completely
honest, getting "out of the box."
Peace of Mind
by David Hunt
"A Course in Miracels" approach
to habits.
The Essence of a Habit
by Daniel DeFrank
How to replace negative habits with
life enhancing ones using the power of our thoughts.
Habits, Physical and Mental
by Betty Perry
Of behavior patterns and patterns of
thought. How they affect our lives.
Habits, Physical and Mental
by Betty Perry
Have you ever considered what drives your activities day after day? You may have answered goals. In a way that is true. However a driving force in your life is your habits which may come as a surprise to you.
Frequently when we hear the word habit we think of things like smoking, drinking, over-eating and other less-than-positive behaviors. We do not think of the many day-to-day actions we undertake without consciously thinking about them. That is what a habit is: an act or thought that we engage in without planning it.
When you arise in the morning do you think, "I must take a shower, brush my teeth and get dressed." I know I do not consciously think about each step in the process of getting ready for the day the way I plan for a class I will teach. I doubt if any of you do. When in the shower I doubt if anyone thinks, "First I will wash my face then my neck etc." We just pick up the wash cloth and soap and get ourselves clean.
How many other activities do we do each and every day without a step-by-step thinking process. It is certainly beneficial that there are certain actions we can do without fully engaging our brains. If we needed to think about everything we do, it would be mental overload.
We do need to be aware of some of the behaviors we do that may be nonproductive or at least ineffective behavior. Some of these are worry, procrastination, irresponsibility, arrogance, lateness, and being untruthful.
Some people combine worry with a crisis orientation. A dear friend of mine seems to have a crisis every day over situations that to me appear minor at best. An example would be having invited a group of friends for a dinner, then get into a mindset worthy of a major earthquake that all might go well. This friend is one of the most competent hostesses I know. Perhaps without the adrenaline rush she gets from the mental crisis she could not do all she does. However, what does that constant adrenaline rush do to her physiology? Raise her blood pressure, set her insulin mechanism off or some other less-than-desirable physical response? Do you tell yourself you work better under pressure? Do you need the adrenaline rush to get moving?
There can be another way. I know I can now accomplish much more without the pressure. I learned to quit procrastinating. Procrastination is the greatest thief of time. Many times we procrastinate because we do not know where or how to start on a project. Start somewhere and begin to get involved with whatever it is that needs to be done. Split a large project into manageable parts and start one at a time. You will find that life is much calmer and feel you are in control rather than being controlled.
I believe we all know someone who "is always late." How do you feel about those folks? I know I do not appreciate having to wait for someone whenever we are to meet. We all get into situations where the unexpected happens and we are late. That is the exception. Always or frequently being late is a means to control others. No one likes to feel they are being controlled. Show consideration to your friends and business associates and change the habit of being late to being on time. Just a little thought and planning can do it. It also helps get past crisis thinking.
Our habits of thought are what color our world. Many of our daily thoughts are the same thoughts we had one, three or more years ago. If you feel that your life has changed little over the years, look at the thought patterns that you have. Have they changed? Just as we have behavior patterns in our physical realm so to do we have thought patterns in our mental realm. These patterns of thought drive us every bit as much as our physical habits.
Learn to monitor your thoughts and when you find some nonproductive thoughts floating around take the time to change them into more productive ones. In the Silva program we spend time doing what we call "Mental Housecleaning," becoming aware of our thoughts and learning how to change them. This is a very powerful thing you can do for yourself. The book What to Say When You Talk to Yourself by Shed Helmstetter explains this process very well. I recommend it highly.
It seems we are all trying to do more than makes good sense these days. In that process some of the habits of good manners and consideration get lost. Do you take the time to read the nametag or remember the name of the person waiting on you and then calling them by name? If you have ever waited on tables you know that a little courtesy means a lot. Another good habit and very productive one is the habit of "please" and "thank you." Some of these little courtesies make a big difference in your life and the lives of those with whom you interact.
You will find that as you take the time to exercise the habit of kindness and consideration toward others you will find it reflected back to you. Won't that make it seem as if the world is truly getting to be a better place? If you think it is so, it is.
Betty Perry, originally a RN, is a trainer for the Silva
Method personally trained by Jose Silva. She is the owner of Dynamics of
Living and director of the Silva Method in the Tampa Bay area. (727) 360
1954. www.silvacourse.com. bettyperry1@juno.com
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